EduCare Advent Care-ndar – Day fifteen

All children love Christmas, don’t they? Unfortunately not. For some children and young people, it can be one of the hardest times of the year. Child protection is the theme of day 15 of our Advent Care-ndar.

Child Protection: Spotting the signs of abuse

Both abusers and the children they abuse can go to great lengths to try to conceal abuse.

Everyone can play a part in helping to protect children by being aware that abuse exists and being prepared to take action should they suspect abuse.

How to respond if a child confides abuse to you

Sometimes, we don’t have to spot the signs, some children may want some help and will seek to confide their worries to you.

If this does happen and a child or young person tells you that they are being abused, it is important that you know how to respond. Here are the universal principles regardless of the age of the child.

• Be welcoming, even if the time isn’t convenient for you. It may have taken a great deal of courage for them to approach you and they may not do so again.
• Find a quiet place where your conversation won’t be interrupted.
• Stay calm and listen very carefully.
• Allow the child to tell you at their own pace.
• Ask questions for clarification only.
• Communicate with the child in a way that is appropriate to their age, preferred communication method (e.g. Makaton or sign language) and ability to understand English.
• Reassure them. Tell them you are sorry this has happened to them and that you will do all you can to help them. Explain what may happen next.
• If emergency help is required, don’t delay getting it.
• Make notes as soon as possible afterwards and sign and date the record you make.
• Contact the safeguarding lead in your organisation and/or your manager immediately.
• If you think a child is in immediate danger, call the police on 999.

What to avoid:

• Do not allow your shock, surprise, anger, distaste, dismay or any other negative emotions to show, although it is OK to show that you’re sorry that this has happened to them and empathise.
• Do not make any comments about the abuser or try to guess who they are.
• Do not ask leading questions, although you can ask questions to clear up an ambiguity.
• Do not promise to keep the conversation a secret.
  
  

Starting difficult conversations

If your concern is about a young person, for example, aged 12 or over, rather than a young child, you could try to initiate a conversation with them to let the young person know that you are there if they need someone to talk to. This may also help to reassure you.

Try to choose a relatively quiet time and location to do this, as privacy is likely to be very important to the young person concerned.

You may find the following phrases helpful to start a conversation or encourage the young person to talk honestly with you.

“I’m concerned about you. Is everything OK?”

“May I have a word with you? You seem to be… Is there anything I can do to help?”

All concerns should be reported to the correct agencies who will determine the most appropriate course of action. Don’t just assume that someone else has reported it.

When it comes to Child Protection, doing nothing is not an option.

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